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Is it strange?Is it strange,
That I want to hate love,
Even though I love you?
Is it strange,
That though I want to treat you like a delicate flower,
I constantly crush you and try to make you mine?
Is it strange,
Every time I see you my heart races,
But I hate you?
Is it strange that I love you,
When I don't?
Too BeautifulLet me cover you in roses,
Even though they pale in comparison to your beauty.
I would give you jewels,
but they are simply rocks around you.
Your eyes twinkle more than the stars,
Your hair is softer than silk.
Your skin a pale white,
Making you a delicate flower.
Clothes are simply thing that hand on to you,
wishing to be as beautiful as you.
Your gorgeous smile blinds me,
making me fall for you even harder.
Your eyes stare at me,
Making it an honor just to be seen by the beauty herself.
I'm lucky to even be within ten feet of this woman,
But a servant mustn't push his luck.
Just being around you is enough,
Even knowing you
AnguishThe lime trees are heavy with the glitter of wind
Words like a host of flies buzz inside my mouth
A fire roars in my head an apocalyptic holocaust
My sentences articulate themselves
Like an erotic bruise on a boys neck
Appearing with a rapacious and concentrated existence
Forcing me into an uncompromising solitude
A concealment like the sitting of a stone in its own shadow
I am on the other side of time where transient moments
Imprint themselves on other people's minds
Forming and colliding in immense fictions
But there is also a sustained silence
Within the speed and space of thought
That holds the creature of my metaphysical an
writingGlass blue birds stitch themselves across my mouth
Catching, capturing, carrying by breath
They cause a tangled nature in my words
Attack the paper forming an anarchy of sentences
Apotheosizing my breath into iambic speech
Of dreams invaded by frantically malign illusions
Chanting, chanting, chanting, chanting, chanting
A form of salacious incantation
That fills me with a need a need
Like a rats craving for poison
Compulsive, irrational and destructive
And here I sit in the complicitious confines of my bedroom
While a cold wind frisks the streets
PovertyThe minds of geniuses
Wasted in the gutter
And failed dances
It's always quicker
To fall to your knees
Ash and dust
The wind whistles in
No barrier will hold
Against this cold
"Welcome to the new age"
Roses are red
Violets are blue
When everyone is fed
There will be nothing left to do
I'm greedyI'm greedy.
I want praise,
I need attention.
Don't turn around,
Only look at me,
And never betray me.
I may seem like a brat,
But I want your love that much,
To steal you from the world,
So you can only look at me.
But am I really selfish?
For loving you,
And wanting you to love me back?
I suppose so.
But there's a problem with that.
I'm greedy, my dear.
You Know Nothing!Today I heard,
From a horrible girl.
Her scratchy voice,
"I don't like people who slit their wrists..."
That's nice to know.
Good that I don't like you isn't it...
I know this wasn't amied at me.
But still enraged me...
She is the kind of thing that sents someone on a relapes...
You don't know anything.
Cutting is adictive.
Cutting is a way to cope.
Yes some horrible people do use it for attention,
But many don't.
I wanted to scream- "Oh so you don't like me then?"
Everyone should have an opinon of something. I get it.
I understand that alot of illness are misunderstood.
But sometimes its whether you
I'm done.The aching in my heart, it only hurts more when they remind me of you.
When I thought it was over, it wasn't, isn't that true.
Is this what you wanted to happen? Did you want me to be upset?
Well congratulations, the only thing I feel for you is hatred.
It's like you're constantly being talked about, the only things on their mind.
Every thing they say, it's like it's being timed.
Do they want to see the pain in my face?
Because everyday it feels like I'm being chased.
But I've had enough, enough of your 'fun and games'.
It's time to get you out of all this fame.
I've had enough, that's the last straw.
I'm going to do somethin
PerfectYou might think I am perfect
But really I'm not
Every time I make one mistake
I feel like a disappoint you a lot
You make it seem I don't live up to your expectations at all
Sorry I'm not perfect
I miss the days when mistakes were accepted
When you said just learn from then
Now I don't even get a chance to explain myself before you assume things
But it seems like it's just to late now
Sorry I'm not perfect
When I do something right
Things are back to how they used to be
But even if I do one little thing wrong
Everything comes tumbling down
Sorry I'm not perfect
I wish I could go back in time to undo all my mistakes
OutsiderMy black soul is seeping of impure and sin
A head full of hay and a heart made of tin
I'm neither the black sheep nor demon tonight
I'm bad incarnated, the pure face of fright
The rules are for weaklings, I just make my own
I created my crown and I crafted my throne
I rule with a thirst for chaos and blood
Pushing others carelessly into the mud
Never regretting I keep committing crimes
Not looking back as the funeral bell chimes
I torture, rape, murder and break people's hearts
I put a quick ending to pure, fresh new starts
What matters is not where I go when I die
I never ask how, when, wherefore and why
I let nature take it's
Invisibility.Invisibility. That's what they say is good.
But I don't want to be invisible... I want to be seen.
Is that wrong? Please, tell me if it is...
Cause I try so hard to be just even noticed.
The girl in the reflection.Can I block out my life? Just for a second?
Is it possible, for a bit, to just block out the world?
I can't even look at myself, I hate what I see in the reflection.
What do I see? A small, hurt, beat, little girl.
Her eyes are red, pain in them.
She's got bruises everywhere, cut's on her wrist.
What's on her mind? Absolute mayhem.
Sometimes she wishes that she never did exist.
Her thick black hair, messily braided.
Her plain white skin and clear blue eyes.
She does nothing, but they always will consider her to be hated...
But she want's to make them happy, she want's to say her goodbyes.
Come With MeCome with me
Into the meadow of dreams
Where time has no meaning
And the world is without
Where the wind whispers softly
Pleasant comfort in lies.
Sit with me
By the waters of fantasy
Where the tides role in
And the water laps at the ground
Where imaginings have no end
And innocence never dies.
Help me to remember
Help me to forget
Help to lose time
And never to regret
BeautyOnce upon a dream there was a boy
who whispered metaphors into his blankets
in the dead of the night. he pǝuɹnʇ them
over and twisted them and s t r e t c h e d them
searching for the melody that would define him.
what he didn't know is that his ears were traitors;
they rejected every rhyme without a trace of shame
and never allowed him to realize that his melodies
were real music, were beauty and love woven
into delicate threads; he only heard cacophony.
night after night he struggled and agonized
never satisfied with any combination of notes
always concluding that he was inferior to the world.
on the other side of the fence, close and far away
a girl with with stars in her eyes cried; her tears
were of the purest silver, the plainest pain.
she cried for verses lost to the valley of her strife
for missed opportunities and bro/ken hearts of iron.
their paths strayed along the leafy jungle of time
l i t t e r e
Tired of Being AfraidI'm tired of being afraid.
I'm fed up with cowering,
always using the dark as a blanket to hide under,
just like i would do when i was young.
I want to go out in to the light,
not stay here and be afraid of everything.
My childhood fears are always in my head,
You used to be the one that could hold my hand,
and pull me out of the blanket of darkness.
But when you left,
not wanting to protect me anymore,
My heart broke,
and my courage you gave me fell apart.
Now the dark protects me,
but I'm tired of being afraid.
I'm no longer a child,
no longer unable to see something for what it truly is.
I might be afraid,
Our SongDo you remember our song?
Our little laugh we would share?
We'd share secrets,
We'd share everything.
We were in love,
and i wasn't afraid to say it.
The sweet song that i had named our song rings in my head,
every time i see your picture in the broken frame.
The glass is broken,
so you can't see your face.
I've become a mess.
Do you remember when we thought we would get married,
have a child and dog,
and we'd never split up?
Seems our naive dreams are what haunt me at night,
making me wonder why i even tried to hold on the the thin string.
I don't want to forget your smile.
I don't want to forget out song.
I fall asleep to
Sacrifice to the DarknessI hold on tightly,
not wanting to let go.
My grip slips,
but i still believe I'm holding on.
As i fall,
The darkness swallows me up,
pulling me down with it.
Is this where i truly belonged?
Was i never to be with the happier people?
It's a shame i can never see your bright smile light up the night again.
I'm a sacrifice to the darkness,
Becoming just like it.
I feel empty,
and abandoned without your arms wrapped around me,
telling me that I will never be alone,
whispering sweet nothings in my ear.
But now all i hear are screams of the pained,
deep inside the darkness.
But as they all scream,
I dream of you.
Of my not letti
Where's home?Am i lost?
Am i running away?
Where is everybody?
I feel like I've been lost,
like i can no longer tell left from right.
My sight is foggy,
and i can't feel anything.
Where am i?
Was i left here,
was i forgotten?
Where did i go?
Am i alive?
Am i being missed?
LostI feel lost.
Like I'm never going to be found.
But am I lost,
Or just hiding?
I want to hide from the real world,
And be surrounded by my childhood dreams.
I don't want to be put in to reality.
I want to stay in my mothers warm embrace,
And laugh at my fathers goofy smile.
I don't want to be scolded by everyone,
And be thrown out of my dreams.
My whole life has been sugar coated,
But why is life turning bitter-sweet now?
I feel lost,
Without the innocence of my childhood.
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`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More